The Love Files No.6 // Commitment Issues
I have not written a “The Love Files” post in ages I just realised even though I know you love reading them! I will try to better here and share more insights of my bizarre love life since it is quite entertaining. OK, so let’s talk about commitment issues today. I feel that we are a generation that is unable to commit. Is it because we come from broken families? Among my friends almost no one is getting married or having a family. I guess the commitment thing is just not really working for us. Indeed, almost everyone of us is single and has been single for years. Not all of us but the majority. So yea, committing ain’t our thing it seems. But it is also the ones who are not from broken families who can’t commit. So maybe the broken family thing is not even the root cause even though it sounds logical to assume that’s where it stems from. Don’t get me wrong, I think you can be perfectly happy being single. Actually I think most people are better off single than in dysfunctional relationships. I know that commitment is an issue for me and I am trying to resolve that.
Some people can’t commit because they think there must be the perfect partner somewhere, even when they are in a relationship that works quite well they think somewhere out there somebody better exists. That is utter bullshit in my opinion but it was also the reason why my ex-boyfriend left me for some random bitch (excuse my French) from his choir because after she hit on him he thought this person is the non-plus-ultra. So people feel they are missing out when they commit to someone and those people have serious commitment issues. I feel that I am much better at committing to myself, to my needs and desires, and ever since that improved, it is easier for me to commit to someone else as well which of course is not a big surprise.
In the past people probably committed easily because of financial dependency and also it was just normal to get married to someone and stay married. But these things have changed. Women became independent (thankfully) and there is no reason to commit to someone so that you are taken care of financially because now women make their own money. I assume that is one reason that explains why commitment issues are kind of a new thing.