TWE NO.33 // Self Doubt
Self-doubt is a feeling that is constantly holding us back if we don't work against it. I decided to write about self-doubt today since several friends and I talked about it quite a lot yesterday. Self-doubt always used to be a big issue for me and I am honest, it still is, maybe not anymore as bad as in the past but it is one of the monsters that I have not really left behind yet. I can say for sure that I probably would have made many different decisions in the past if self-doubt and a lack of self-love had not been holding me back. I am still not exactly where I want to be but I am slowly working my way through all my issues and unresolved blocks in order to live a life filled with joy, happiness and abundance.
I always admired the people who are full of self-esteem and no matter what seems to happen, they always seem to get what they want. It has not been like that for me. I guess it has a lot to do with your perspective. If you feel worthy and have a healthy self-esteem, chances are high that self-doubt is not an issue for you, or at least not to the extent as it is for the ones lacking a healthy self-esteem and self-worth. Self-doubt is something holding you back from moving on, moving forward, making your dreams come true. Believe me, I know what I am talking about. I was so full of self-doubt that I did not dare taking any move into the right direction - like choosing a career path that makes me happy and is something I really wanted to do work-wise. Now I do a lot better here but it took me ages to break out of old patterns that kept holding me back.
It is important to let go of people and jobs, situations that even further make you doubt yourself. Boundaries is the key word here. It is important to surround yourself with people who lift you up instead of bringing you down. And it is even more important that you are not the one holding yourself back because that my friend happens quite often. Being so in doubt, lacking self-love and self-respect that you are actually the main person that is holding you back from finally living the life that you want to live. Instead you constantly sabotage yourself and then you feel full of self-doubt, unworthy, no self-esteem and this is just the worst combination to feel miserable. We don't want that. So make sure you talk to yourself the way you want others to talk to you.
I am doing my best to leave my fear and self-doubt behind as much as I can. I have achieved a lot in life and I will achieve even more. My goal is to run a successful little design studio, to be financially independent and to live the life I always dreamt of. But this is only possible and going to happen once I leave behind my inner blocks, my self-doubt and see myself in the light I want to be seen in by others which is that I am a successful, creative designer/illustrator/writer who is going her own way and succeeds. Until yesterday I did not realise how present my self-doubt still is and how much it is actually holding me back. Therefore I decided to write about it, in order to leave it behind and to make space for a future self full of self-esteem, self-worth, self-love and self-respect because this is the basis to become exactly the kind of person you want to be.
I feel we all live with so many inner demons who constantly make us feel miserable and worthless. I want to let go of these inner demons and I want all of you who go through the same struggles to also let go of them.
Why are we always so afraid to fail? Especially considering how far we have come already which is the proof of how many successes we already experienced. Why is it that one bad experience constantly overshadows all the good experiences so we complete forget about them? It is something to become aware of. Look at everything you achieved already instead of looking at everything you see as failure. It is all a matter of perspective and it is the crucial thing to change your mindset here. It is not easy but it is a matter of practise. I feel that in our society we are constantly driven by fear and this is not helping anyone of us. We have to choose love over fear, we have to believe in ourselves and our abilities and talents in order to succeed. And this is my lesson for the next few weeks!